Made In America

I've only posted about one hundred gazillion dozen times about my Turkish Bed Socks.  So instead of re-hashing the whole process, I thought I would recap my overall thoughts ... be ye not as dumb as me, READ THE PATTERN.

Having knit, reknit, cut, grafted, and re-reknit these socks some more, I finally ended up with a finished pair of socks, and an extra heel cup area, and thought I was done.  So then I went out and purchased (an early Valentine's Day gift from my awesome husband) a pair of ugly shoes only to find (really??) that my socks are too long for the look I wanted.  Because I still, AFTER ALL OF MY SCREW UPS, DISREGARDED THE PATTERN!?!

So, if I want my socks to look like this, my initial inspiration,  the whole reason that I wanted to knit the socks, some sort of strange handknit sock porn for me, if I want that, I have to fold over an inch or so of the sock and tuck them under my toes.  Which you know, NOT comfortable.  Yes, the pattern said knit them shorter than normal and I said shorter schmorter.  Again, be ye not as dumb as me, READ THE PATTERN.  I could cut them and regraft them, you know AGAIN but I am done.  D. O. N. E. done. I'm just gonna wear them with other shoes and call it a day.

Yarn: SHIBUI Sock, color orchid, #4021, lot #5787, slightly less than 1 skein
Needles: Addi Turbo Circs, size 3.0 mm (US 2.5)
Pattern: Churchmouse Yarn's Turkish Bed Socks
Modifications: Too many.  Next time, follow the directions EXACTLY
Time: 5 days.
Care: Machine wash, gentle cycle, cold water. Dry flat.

10oT: Knitting Spot

Today's Ten on Tuesday topic is 10 Things You Can See From Your Favorite Knitting Spot.  Years ago (back in 2006 ... woah!), I posted about my favorite knitting spots. At that time I was fancy free and had no kids. I could knit anywhere I wanted, when I wanted, however I wanted. I also had a fetish for the bathroom it seems? My apologies. Nowadays I can't even sit on the toilet without someone wanting to sit on my lap. I. KNOW. And also, more bathrooms? Really?!? Anyway, no one tells you this when you say you want to have kids. But be not as foolish as me, enjoy your lone bathroom time while you can! Anyway, I digress.

When I knit now, it is either at Starbucks on Wednesday night with my lady friends or it is on the couch after I've put the kids to bed. No longer is my venue chosen by style or ambiance, nope it is 100% easy access, drop where you're standing, comfort. Also known as the couch in my family room.  It's not as exciting as it use to be, I mean it is no Stiltsville, but it is functional.  So, 10 things I see when looking straight ahead, to the right, and to the left are ...


  
1) A current WiP: These are the skew socks. And, like the Turkish Bed Socks, they have an unusual construction. It's taken me several tries to get the sizing right but now that the left foot fits, I can move on to the right and (hopefully) motor down the home stretch.

2) The TV: Awww. Mark Harmon. How I love thee.

3) Kid Toys: They take up a third of the living room. At least that is what I try to limit them too.  I may be deluding myself.

4) Knitting Notions: I've recently separated my stitch holders into two containers, one for the closed kind and one for the removable kind. This pleases my OCD.

5) The TV Remote: You know, so I can pause on Mark Harmon when I'm using my mobile phone to take photos of my tv.

6) The Dog: Once the kids are in bed (the only time I can safely knit at home), I let the dog join me on the couch. We snuggle and reminisce about our day. Or she naps. 

7) My iPad: You can't see it in the photos but I have the pattern I'm working on in there.  Also, I  can check my email, facebook and pinterest. You know, the important things.

8) The Baby Monitor: Because even when I'm off the clock, I'm not.  Also, I get a kick out of eavesdropping on my kids.  J1 knows I do it but forgets and J2 is clueless.  They like to hatch up crazy plans and I like to thwart them.  I'm supportive that way.

9) Hand Sanitizer & Lotion: We've all been sick up in these parts (hence the nebulizer too) and so I've been sanitizing the heck out of everyone. And then lotioning them too. All that sanitizing is kind of drying.

10) The Phone: Yes, we do indeed have a landline.  And I use it. Call me old fashion, but I prefer it to my mobile phone.

Snip!

Yes.  I did it.  I couldn't help myself.  I cut my sock in half.  I knit a new top and then cut the old top off in the hopes of making my socks a nice uniform pair.  Having invested the time to knit these babies, I decided that anything worth doing, was worth doing well.  Sadly, there are several levels of "well" but that is for my finished these friggen objects post.  For now, I shall show you my fearlessness of the scissor.

Step one, knit a second heel and then make sure the second heel a) matches the heel you are trying to duplicate (a/k/a you read the instructions and follow them), and b) lines up with the half of the dud sock you are keeping.

Step two, cut into that baby.  These are small socks so there was no need for a fortifying shot of rum (also, that is frowned on in the third trimester and I don't want to have Schickabibbles sprout a third ear at this late date).  I did cut all of my old rows on not-per-instruction-cuff which made for several random strings of yarn in the pulling out process.  Mistake on my part.  Perhaps I should have fortified with something.

Step three, spend an eternity pulling out the yarn you cut so that you have two separate pieces. 

Step four, put the keeper piece of sock (in my case this was the foot) onto a set of needles and get the direction of everything all squared up properly.  Count to make sure your number of stitches on your new keeper part is the same as on your old keeper part.  An equal number of stitches on the old sock foot and new heel is needed for proper grafting (she says to herself in a stern DUH voice).  I also likes looking at my old top and knowing it contained my extra yarn cushion.  Should I need such a cushion.  Which since I never make mistakes, hahahaha, I wouldn't.

Step five, line up the old bit on its needles with the new bit on its needles and start to graft.  On the first stitch I (inserted the darning needle like I had) knitted the bottom off and then (inserted the darning needle like I had) purled the top off, which is actually the first, but not final, step for each needle when grafting because I figured at the end when I was back over here I would be doing the other step. 

Step six, graft, graft, kitchner, kitchner.  Over and over again.  Seriously.  There are like sixty or so stitches you are meshing together.  This ain't no eight stitches toe.  Actually, it is not that hard when you chant in your head "KNIT OFF, PURL ON, PURL OFF, KNIT ON." When you have a two year old, sick, snot laden, toddler using you for a jungle gym it does amp up the difficulty level.  And perhaps, with absolutely no knowledge of how, you may end up kitchnering a pearl stitch two or three random times.  Mind you, I could not kitchner a pearl stitch if you paid me, so I am not sure exactly how that happened.  In any event, it is good enough for me and not (I hope) that noticeable when all is said and done.  I'll let you judge for yourself when I do a finished object post. 

Hubris

It turns out that if I was half as smart as I thought I was, I'd be twice as smart as I actually am.  Huh?  Yah, I know. 

I have knit a gazillion pairs of socks in the last five or so years. Okay, maybe not a gazillion pairs, but easily two dozen pairs. When it gets cold, I can go two weeks in hand knit sock and not have to wash any. I've done toe up, I've done cuff down, I've done funky Cat Bordhi style, I've done heel flaps and short row heels. Hell, I have cut socks in half and ripped out the middle when they were too big. Which I suppose is why after a quick skimming of the Turkish Bed Sock patter, I dove in and didn't look back. When I couldn't make the pattern work, I search high and low for errata. It wasn't out there. Only when I tried to solve the problem on my own did I think that perhaps I was intuiting a wee smidge too much. And it was on this, my third attempt, that I realized that one of my many issues was that I was knitting in the round and NO WHERE in the directions was I told to do so. Whoops.

In a normal person this type of fatal error would act as a reminder to READ THE PATTERN, not even closely, just you know READ IT.  But, well, I have never claimed normalcy. And I didn't read the pattern, closely, or otherwise.  Which is why when I got to the foot part of the first sock (which had a few "tweeks" to make it work), I realized that my knitting was aligned backwards.  I decided to ignore it, assumed my second sock would have the same directional issues, finished the sock, tried it on with mediocre results, assumed mediocre results were due to my lack of clogs, and started the second sock.
And well then ... hello there instructions!  For some reason when I skimmed the instructions for the second sock some light bulb went off in the deep recesses of my brain and I realized a few things.  Like that one of my MANY problems was due to my inability to follow instructions for the FIRST THREE ROWS.  Was that a communal groan?  It should be.  So, I (mostly) followed the directions for the second sock and now have two socks that are more like kissing cousins that twins (of the fraternal or identical variety). The big differences are in how the top part of the sock fits which means that the first one, it doesn't fit so well and shloops down into a funky heel thing.  What you ask, well this:

The sock on the right is the dud.  So now I have a conundrum.  What to do? If there was no seaming in the sock (let alone two seams and a kitchner), this wouldn't be a post as I would have ripped out that first sock and been on my way ... again.  But there is seaming and I hate ripping our seaming, sooooo, I am not sure what my next step will be.  I think I have enough yarn left over that I am toying with the idea of knitting a third top part and then cutting the top (and seamed bits off) and somehow sticking them all back together.  This may be too grandiose of a plan.

Perhaps I should just buy the stupid clogs.  I'd like to think that if the socks were in the clogs then their reality would miraculously converge with their intent and BAM, I'd be in business with my new socks.  But then again, if I was half as smart as I think I am ...

Gobble gobble

I've started on a pair of Churchmouse's Turkish Bed Socks.



Not because I have nothing to work on. Nope. Not even because I don't have any socks to work on. Noooo, I started them because I LOVE this picture that is on the pattern. It makes me warm, fuzzy, and envious.  I've hated those clogs for years thinking, despite several of my friends' claims to the contrary, that they are THE. UGLIEST. SHOES. EVER. But something has been eating away at my brain the last two winters (cooped up in a house with the kids perhaps) and now it seems that I want a pair. Very much so.  And well, if I am going to have a pair, I need some of the socks too.  Sadly, whatever has been eating at my brain and convincing it that I need me some ugly shoes, has also affected my ability to read a pattern and follow directions.  Three tries to get me to the point above and that is after I decided that yes, I could live the with the fact that the sock is backwards, or upside down, or whatever word means that I am knitting in the wrong direction.  Whoopsie!

Smile

Starting the New Year off with happy feet in clean hand knit socks!

Socky Sherbet

This weekend, while sprawled out on a couch during a girls' weekend, I finished the Sunday Swing Socks. As soon as they were done, I put them on and went for a walk along the beach hunting for sea glass. It turns out, I am a MUCH better sock knitter than I am sea glass finder ... even after consuming an entire bottle of wine and some Poochi Poochi Sake.


These socks were so unbelievably easy to knit. So easy that I never actually printed out the pattern. I looked at the pattern online and knitted from the iPad for the first round or so and then realized that the spacing was six stitches and eight stitches and that was then end of my need for the pattern. I did goof at one point and switch the eight and the six so one repeat is off, but I am pretending that it never happened and in fact, that last bit of the sentence is going to self-destruct as soon as you click away from this entry. Seriously. It will. Though you shouldn't click back and double check or my secret Sycophant Zombie Army will have to come and assimilate you into the fold.

Anyway, I digress. These socks are easy. Though I suspect that if these were your first socks, you might want to refer to the pattern a little more than me. I didn't alter anything in the pattern, except the cuff/ribbing, which I had started before I determined what pattern these socks were going to be. I'm not sure what the pattern calls for but a simple k1,p1 rib works fine.

Also fine? The yarn. It is ArtYarns and it is lovely. I am a fan of ArtYarns yarns and am bummed to hear (from several unrelated sources) that the woman who is ArtYarns is a bit of a yahoo who is trying to re-brand herself and in doing so is pricing her self out of the market. Well at least for cashmere. Which these socks are not. But still. I don't like the word on the street. Assuming the sock yarn stays affordable, and you are interested, I'd say it is a nice knit. Not splitty. Not knotty. Smooth and flowy and squishy. I'm not sure how it will wear and if the colors will fade (Koigu I'm looking at you ... fader!) as I have only used the ArtYarns cashmere and silk before, but I am hopeful. Really hopeful. I have a skein leftover, as well as a bit left over from each skein that I knit the socks from and am thinking kid socks (though these aren't superwash which could be tricky with the under three crowd).

So, as the great Charlie Sheen would say, these socks? WINNING, Duh!


Yarn: ArtYarns Ultramerino 4, less than two skeins, color 127.
Needles: Addi Circs, size 2.5 mm (US 1)
Pattern: Sunday Swing Socks
Time: 4 weeks!
Care: Hand wash and dry flat in shade.

Sockalooloo

In between all of my cowl knitting, I have been working on my old Knitting Olympics/Ravelympics sweater. I'm plodding along without much motivation, but it is a brainless sweater that cruises along. Now that I have the front, back, and hood done, you'd think I would crank out the sleeves and be done with it. You'd think wrong. Instead, I've been working on a pair of socks. I dug out some yarn I scored at last year's SnB Holiday PartySwampamajig and balled it (I'm a Baller, yo), but wasn't sure what I was going to do with it. I batted around the idea of pedicure socks but couldn't commit. So I started the cuff and then carried it around in my knitting bag. Because you know, why not carry around random yarn?


It turns out my aimlessness was fortuitous as Linda is making a pair of socks and recommended the pattern she is using for my yarn and badabing badabang, I got me some actual socks on the needles.

Though this picture is some what crappy as one of my beloved little snowflakes took the camera battery out of the charger and put it ... somewhere unknown to me (JERK!), and I had to use our old camera, it doesn't totally hide an error I made in one of the socks. I was watching the snooze fest that was this year's Oscars and was moving along nicely until BAM, Jude Law and Robert Downey, Jr. appeared and were entertaining. That split second of shock was enough to have me all hinky in my sock. But not so hinky that I ripped back. I did tink, but the tinking is noticeable and yet, I am okay with it. One might consider this a sign that my kids have started to beat me down. If it gets much worse, if I let errors roam free, please stage an intervention.

Cold Feet

For the first time in ... an eternity, LB/Jillian is napping. I decided to make use of this time and notclean, notlaundry, notdishes and surf the internet. Actually, I first spent time alphabetizing our kids books. Seriously. I have problems. I only got one shelf done though. Which actually is so irksome that I, well, I can't even verbalize the irksomeness of it. I can state, however, that I will most likely be alphabetizing more books tonight. Such is the fast paced life I live. In any event, as I was surfing the internet, my feet became unacceptably cold. Conveniently, I had a pair of handknit socks sitting next to the computer. Not so conveniently, they had been sitting there for months waiting to be photographed and blogged. So, in the interest of having warm feet with minimal fuss, I pulled out the socks, gave them a good shake (dust), used my shirt to wipe the dust off of the corner of the desk, and snapped a few photos. Then I put them on, sat back down and here I am, sock shod and sassy!



The socks do not to lie flat, making them hard to photograph in a normal sock-like fashion (and also making me nervous that they were not actually going to fit on my feet). So I ended up folding them in a way that, for some admittedly weird reason, reminded me of maxipads.



I can't remember much about these socks. Except that I started them in May and was less than thrilled with the colors when working on them and noticed something hinky with the heel as I was going along. Said hinkyness might be why the socks don't sit sock like.

As an aside, it has been so long since I've blogged, I forgot what I called my kids on the blog. Many years ago [snort], I worked with nutjobs and wackados and total anonymity was important. Now, not so much. So I am using my kids' real names. If you'd like, I'll also give you my social security number, address, and home phone number (yes, I know, how passé, I have a home phone).



Yarn: C*EYE*BER Fiber, Vancouver Island sock coordinates
Needles: Addi Circs, size 2.5 mm (US 1) which are now M.I.A????
Pattern: Um... Toe up star toe, stockinette, short row heel, 2x2 rib cuff.
Time: No idea.
Care: Machine washable, gentle. Dry flat.

Six Random Things

1) I like silly bandz. I bought some on a lark for LB and decided to give her one when she did something good on her own and without my pleading. On a good day she would end up with five or six of them which, at the end of the day, I would take back so that I could start again on the next day. This worked out until she started breaking and losing them and I kind of decided that I liked them. Now we are running out and I don't have enough for her or for me. Which makes me sad. Yes, I am sad because I only have a few of my two year daughter's animal shaped rubber bands left to wear on my wrist. Can you say loser?

2) I have a kitchen in my garage. Well not a functioning one. And, not one with appliances. Fine, I have a bunch of kitchen cabinets and some granite counter tops in my garage. Some how when everything was stored, the island was stored properly, which is to say it is a functioning island with cabinets and a top. A functioning island that now has two days worth of mail and six bottles of soda sitting on it. My point: an island is rather useful in the garage.

3) I have reknit my short-row heel and made it larger. I like it enough that I have started the second heel.

4) I have also started a garden. I PLANTED STUFF IN THE GROUND. WHERE BUGS LIVE. Mind you the majority of my garden consists of herbs in containers. But still, there are some chives, basil, parsley and oregano IN THE BUG FILLED GROUND.

5) TD seems to have mastered the art of sitting up. Mere hours after we were at her pediatrician's and I stated that she in fact could not sit up for squat. Note I also stated she couldn't eat food. She made sure I knew this statement was one hundred percent true as she took her first ever bite of banana, spit it out, and then projectile vomited on me. A lot.

6) There are twenty-one episodes of Law and Order in my DVR. Every single one of them is from 1994 or earlier and has Michael Moriarty as the prosecutor. I watched those shows when they were first shown and thought they were great. Now I watch them and think they are great, yet dated. Stuff from my teenage years feels dated. HOLY FUCK.

Vexed

Still working on my socks and I feel as if my short row heel is ... too short?


It just feels small and I don't like it which means I need to rip it out and do it over. Of course, I won't have hotty hot hot Tom Selleck as Jesse Stone to watch and get me through which is a total bummer.

Also a bummer? Revlon Cherry Pop nail polish. Painted the nails yesterday afternoon and woke to small chips this morning. Shame on you Revlon!

Motoring Along

Still knitting STOP Almost have a pair of socks STOP


Okay not entirely true STOP Almost have half a pair of socks STOP And, as always, liked the verigated yarn in the hank and in the ball but not so much when knitted up STOP When will I learn STOP

Continuation

Olllleeeee! Ole, ole, ole, OLE! Happy Cinco de Mayo! I'm celebrating with some knitting and perhaps, some salsa. Yes, that's right. Not only did I finish some baby socks, I started some Me socks!


If Cinqo de Mayo wasn't reason enough for a party, knitting some Jenna socks should be!

Duh

I'm an asshole! I know better. And yet. Yet, I admitted to the universe that I had two simultaneously napping children. And the universe, it said, Nu Uh. And up woke TD.


Since she was awake, I did manage to snap a photo of her wearing her new socks.

Jungle Boogie

Ta da! I finished the itsy bitsy baby socks. Unfortunately, the itsy bitsy (well not so itsy bitsy, rather rolly polly) baby is sound asleep and unavailable for a photo op. And actually, being that LB is also asleep ... this is really not that unfortunate. Two kids napping at the same time? Totally fortunate. Also rare. So of course I am using my alone time productively by farting around on the internet. Woot!



In case you are curious, these socks took up NO YARN. I mean really. I made a full on whole pair of adult Monkey Socks with this yarn and had two little balls left over. These guys took up one of the remaining little balls. Insane. Also, when used on such a small project, the yarn stripes and is not the psychedelic blur it is on bigger projects. Neat.

Yarn: Lorna Laces, Shepherd Sock, Color 302, Jungle Stripe
Needles: Addi Circs, size 2.5 mm (US 1)
Pattern: None. Toe up star toe, 28 rows in the rounds, short row heel, 6 rows rib.
Time: Actual knitting time - 3.5 days. Total time - one month.
Care: Machine washable.

Hello?

I have many MANY halfway finished posts which have languished in a draft folder for quite sometime. I hope to cobble them together to say something intelligent, but until then ... I have knit one sock. One sock that is too large for my bambina, but not so large that she won't be wearing it.


Ta da! Also, I need a manicure.

Sweater Scmeter

I don't like knitting sweaters. It's true. I like wearing sweaters. I like owning sweaters. But the knitting part, not so much. That last few days LB has been sick, we've been housebound and I've been a surly bitch. My patience is nil and my empathy for whiny little girls, sick or otherwise, is negative nil. I've repeatedly thought that I should turn on Elmo so that she could veg out on the couch and I could sit and knit next to her and maybe mellow out a tad. And this is a wonderful plan, except when I pull out the sweater I get more grumpy and more surly and then when LB drops her cup of milk, because apparently she is incapable of holding her cup for extended periods of time but also refuses to put it on the table because I asked her to and that means she must not, um, anyway, she drops her cup, creates a minute shower of milk droplets all over the couch, her sister, and the floor, and I explode. That sentence was so long, even I got lost in the middle.

So yah, I hate knitting sweaters. I do not, however, hate knitting socks. I like knitting socks. Speaking of which, here is a pair I finished knitting some time ago.



I find these socks to be quite comfortable when I am pole dancing. They prevent blisters when I am working a long shift and they keep my feet warm too. A+ for function. Also, A+ for form. See how aesthetically pleasing they are with their precisely matching stripes? Nice, eh? I suspect those matching stripes get me better tips.



Yarn: Regia, Design Line, Kaffe Fassett, 4253, 27053.
Needles: Addi Circs, size 2.5 mm (US 1) WHICH I HAVE SINCE LOST!?!
Pattern: Jaywalker
Modifications: Toe up.
Time: One month.
Care: Machine wash, tumble dry low heat.

W-w-w-wwwhhheeewwww

Barely, but yes!



Now listen Dummy! Don't do that again!

C-c-c-cccrrraaapppp

Binding off ... EZ's sewn bind off ... Will I make it?

Bling II

I never did my F.O. blog post on my pink sparkly sock because I didn't like how the pictures came out.



I kept thinking that I would ask my husband to take pictures of my socks but it never came up. Or, I would think of it when he wasn't home. Or, I'd think of it when he was mowing the lawn. You know, at all of those opportune moments.



And, at some point, I totally forgot that I had shitty pictures I wanted to replace. Then I broke my foot, got a sexy new shoe, and decided to wear hand knit socks every day and create a photo journal of them (which I will be posting because a) I am a dork; b) I am lame; c)'Cause I want to, so there!). It was about this time that I remembered that my pink sparkle socks were never photographed nicely and, being that my feet were two different sizes - pregnancy minor swell and broken shit major swell - the nice pictures were no more than a pipe dream. Which, kinda sucks but really, in the grand scheme of things? No biggy.

But then, because yes, I am a drama queen and there is always a BUT. THEN. But then, my sweet angelic little love child decided to play with the pink sparkle socks, and how could you blame her? Pink! Sparkle! Hello? But then, her play resulted in one being left under the desk in the office and the other being buried in a load of laundry. This might not seem like it is worthy of a BUT. THEN. but wait! BUT. THEN. My husband did that augmented load of laundry and the sock survived ... the pompom did not!



Now if I had actually done that F.O. post, this would be TEAR JERKING! You would know that:
a) This yarn was a left-over yarn swap for which I only had enough for one pair of peds;
b) Worried about yarn yardage, I was skimpy with the heel flap;
c) The skimpy heel flap was problematic as my shoes ate my sock after a single half an hour wear;
d) I MacGyvered a resolution ... POMPOMS! Pompoms prevented the shoe from eating the sock ... a very attractive speed bump, if you will;
e) Remember that yardage concern, well, post pompoms, I have no more yarn left over. None. Nil. Not one tiny fiber.

Had I finished that F.O. post, then I could have gone with my original post idea which was:

One of these things is not like the other ...



But alas, I did not. So you get a rambling post and I get to relive, through poor photography, how much I enjoyed those pompomed pretties! Oh, and in case you are curious as to what a pompom looks like when it comes out of the dryer ...



This is all that remained in our lint filter. Pathetic, eh? I'm not sure what I am going to do as I can't seem to bring myself to remove the other pompom. I loved those pompoms. For so long as I wear my gimp shoe, which I really hate, I can probably get away with the mismatched pompomedness, though the gimp shoe did eat my sock creating a uncomfortable and slightly painful situation. I suppose I could go out and buy more yarn, but $20 or so for a pompom, that seems a little excessive.

Until I decide, this is gonna be my F.O. post, but it might also be the R.I.P. post too.



Yarn: Berroco Sox Metallic in Guava, #1375.
Needles: Addi Circs, size 2.5 mm (US 1)
Pattern: Standard toe-up ped, using the cast on, toe, and heel mentioned here.
Time: Two weeks.
Care: Machine wash warm water. No bleach. Lay flat to dry. FOR THE LOVE OF COOKIES DO NOT PUT THIS IN THE DRYER!