Sad

On Thursday we had to euthanize our poor sweet kitty and it is fucking killing me.



I don't really like cats. Nonetheless, when we took my mom's dog to the vet fifteen years ago and the vet asked if we wanted a cat and we said no and then he brought out a pot-bellied, jumbo pawed, mini-tail and mini-head, kitten named Ugh. A. Lee, we fell in love. Turns out Ugh became Ernest, and we became smitten. For the last fifteen years Ern would greet my husband at the door and jump into his arms when he came home. He would sit on my lap while I knit or watched t.v. and he would fall asleep in my hair and migrate to my feet as the night progressed. He fell in love with LB and would let her pet him, smack him, kiss him, hug him, sit on him, and ride him like a horse. I thought that with the dog and the baby, he didn't get as much of our time, that he was a bit marginalized. But now that he's not around, I realize how much he was part of our day to day lives.

It turns out, mourning a pet is similar to mourning a human family member in that the little things creep up on you. You're lying in bed and you hear a thump thump, you think, oh, it is Ernest coming up the stairs. Cue tears. You're at the store and checking out, all of a sudden you realize, you don't need plastic bags anymore since you don't have a litter box to change anymore. Cue tears. You go into the basement and leave the door open. You think SHIT as you turn around to shut the door because you don't want the cat to come down and get caught up in a mouse trap. Cue tears. When you've had your furbaby for fifteen years, they become people. They become your children. They become integral parts of your lives that you miss them like hell when they are gone.

I've been exalting his virtues, and though they were many and he was a sweet, sweet boy, he also would bite. Me. He would bite me an only me. Preferably when I was sound asleep. I like to think he was having kitty dreams and my ankle or foot or whatever, was some great menace he was chasing. This is somewhat more pleasant than thinking he was a sadistic bastard to me, and only me. Either way, I loved him lots and miss him lots.

Duet

My MiL is here for a visit with her favorite (and obviously best) granddaughter which is quite nice. Said granddaughter is turning one this Friday and having a party to celebrate same on Saturday. Also, quite nice. The house (mine, as in where the party is being held, not say, the house that Ruth built) is not ready for a party, and this, this is not quite nice. In other words, Holy Shit my house is a mess and twenty-five people are going to come over for LB's birthday and find out we live like pigs. Instead of bitching about our sty-like conditions, I should be cleaning them. After all, my child has a playmate which relieves me of that duty (duty ... doodie ... heh, I am seven) and I have time to remove the hairballs gathering under the buffet. Instead of doing this, I am hiding in the office, checking my e-mail (wink, wink, nudge, nudge) and doing everything possible BUT clean. Which is not to say I have not cleaned. For I have. A lot. For example, I removed the nobs from the stove and cleaned underneath them. Now that, THAT is cleaning. Which, I guess is not "a lot" of cleaning. But still. It doesn't explain why I am sitting here, overwhelmed by the wafting stench of the stinkiest cat poop ever (which was really mean of the cat - he saw me in here and was like, Sooooo what? I gotta pooh and this is where my box is suckah). Nothing could explain it. Sheer laziness? I know not. What I do know is that I have killed five whole minutes with this drivel despite the need for gas mask. Go me. And, so as to kill five more minutes, let me tell you about my BRILLIANT anniversary gifts.

As I have mentioned before, we try to do the gift thing in accordance with official guidelines. Which, yah, not so official. But whatever. So this year the things were wood and silverware. In case you were wondering, these things SUCK. I've been married five years and THIS is what the universe deems appropriate. Suck it universe! But, being a sheep, and incapable of developing a thought of my own, I went with the guidelines. Wood? Easy. Toothpicks and matches. Done. Silverware? Now that is hard. Well, I suppose if we didn't have twelve place settings of perfectly fine silverware, then it would not have been hard as I would have just bought silverware. But we do have silverware, fancy and plain, and the last time I checked my husband was a "man's man" and had absolutely no interest in acquiring a new silver pattern, which meant that silverware was hard. I say was because, DUDES, I rock. Drum roll please ... For our fifth wedding anniversary gift, I got Boo some silverunderware. I KNOW. Brilliant. So long as you whisper "under" it is all good! In case you are curious, Boo was much more 'in the box' getting me a nice wooden picture frame and a cheese knife set. He did get creative and gave me a cheap wooden picture frame, with a picture of his friend in it, a friend who's last name is Wood. But I have to say if you put his Wood against my silverunderware, I get the vote for most creative. Granted silverunderware was his "real" gift, so I also get the vote for "cheap ass" and "least exciting anniversary gift ever." But hey, you win some and you lose some. And on that note, I shall shimmy out of here and clean because HOLY FUCK, WHAT DID THE CAT EAT?

Delayed

I had intended to take a cute animal picture and post it with some "Happy Halloween" sentiments. Unfortunately the only sentiment I seemed to capture was one in which it looks like Cat is dropping a deuce in a candy bowl ...



In other news the sweater is done and blocked and waiting for a day cool enough to be worn and photographed.

Now With Less Crazy

A new day, less insanity? I'm hoping so. The whole Crazy thing yesterday really did creep me out. For months now I've been hearing how she wants to deliver my baby and what she'll do if I have contractions at work (including graphic details on the things she would do to me) and how she keeps seeing things that the baby MUST HAVE and how she must visit my baby because she is REALLY good with kids so I need to bring her to work and how I should rethink my stance on 'no visitors' in the hospital and how her only regret is not having children of her own; not to mention all the nasty and mean things that I hear from other people that she has said about me behind my back. Thus far it has been comical, or at least weirdly amusing, but that card totally crossed the line into Fatal Attraction territory and I don't want my bunny boiling in that bitch's pot. Ya know? Anywho, I could go on and on about the sick comments that Crazy kept dropping yesterday and the apparent intent to give me/us yet more items, but instead I am going to focus on the good, the happy, the not creepy. So let us begin.

Did you know that there is no number that starts with the letter W? I know this because I was going to make up for bailing on Ten on Tuesday by giving you, um, Weven on Wednesday? Yah, that doesn't work. I could have been ghetto and done "Won on Wednesday" acting like won was one, but I restrained myself (just barely) because there is something already out there for Wednesday ... WIP Wednesday. I'm not sure if it is an organized thing, or if people just do it on their own, but either way I am calling dibs on it today. So, here we go, my works in progress.

First we have Clapotis in all of her pink and purpley sparkly goodness.



She is probably not as close to done as I think she is, but I am on the decreases and it is moving right along. I hope to have her done by Sunday. Maybe. We'll see.

Then we have the Sweet Pea socks. I wasn't digging on the Un-Ridged Feather so I ripped back to the toe(s). Now I need to figure out where to go from here.



When you get up to an average sock number of stitches, the yarn seems to stripe with the purple and yellow going together which is okay, I guess. It reminds me of the LSU Tigers. I have no affiliation with LSU and so this isn't really a good thing. On the other hand, I don't hate the Tigers, so I guess it isn't a bad thing either.

Last, we have the old Kangaroo Duo chestnut. I haven't worked on this in ... well quite some time. I think at some point I wanted to have it done for this winter.



At some point I must have been high. I wonder if I can have it done by next winter. I need to use my brain to do some sleeve math and quite frankly that is about as appealing as ... spending time with Crazy. Well, maybe not that unappealing. But you catch my drift.

And how about re-visiting a finished handkint? Like my cozy pedicure socks. My feet are swollen little sausages and I can't reach my toes for shit. Add the Crazy factor in, and all I can say is that it was extremely fortuitous that I had a pedicure scheduled for last night. Apparently I was still a little stressed as my polish is um, somewhat dark. Not what one would call "Spring-ish" but that is okay because the experience was great.





Even Dogarella was into the pedicure wanting to check out my toes and compare the color with her fur-tone. We decided it was too dark for her complexion and that she needs something a little brighter.

Also warm and fuzzy, if not cozy ... The cuddly lovebugs that I come home to and that are always happy to see me and don't want talk shit about me when I am not around or, you know, boil my bunny.





I was going to say "Also not crazy ..." but let's be honest here, these guys have their own brand of crazy, like someone who removes her bedding from her crate and takes it up two flights of stairs to place it in the middle of our bed. Or someone else who has an unholy attraction to heat vents and likes to rub his furry belly all over them and then collapse on top of them in a big ole pile a mush. I think it's that they are cute so their crazy is totally acceptable.

Happy Halloween

"HELP! Somebody, PLEASE! Get me the hell out of this haunted house!"

I Am So Bummed

So today was the annual Halloween contest at Baby Girl's daycare place. As you may recall, I was stressing over her costume because last year she won and thus set the bar VERY HIGH. Well I my brain was churning and working away when BAM, thought I had a GREAT idea. An idea so fantabuolous, Dogbert was sure to win again. Not that I am that kind of mom or anything. We'd totally be okay if she was only in the top three. I mean, the dog was a bum and you don't always expect greatness from a bum.



But it turns out, bums aren't winners and they aren't even runners up. Now I don't begrudge the winner.



A weimaraner confederate soldier? With his own gun. He totally rocked. He deserved the win. But a doctor ...



I don't think so. Maybe it's sour grapes, maybe it is because Baby Girl is MUCH cuter, or maybe it's the fact that this year there were actual judging criteria this year other than "pick your favorite," but Boo and I are thinking (rationalizing) that Baby Girl was automatically out of the running since she won last year. I mean, come on. How could this sweet little bum not be in the top three?



Fortunately Baby Girl is a good sport and didn't seem to mind the loss. In fact, she seemed a little relieved that she wouldn't have to spend the day in the spa. Cat was also relieved, and grateful, for surviving another year un-costumed.

Yippie-Kay-Yay

Didn't I say something about only needing to have my label cloud fixed to set my blog back to rightness? Well guess what? I did it! Yah baby! So if you are having label cloud issues and you used this to set up your cloud, I'd say look in the comments here for the answers or at least inspiration.

You'd think with all this blog repair I wouldn't have had much time for knitting, but you'd be wrong. Actual knitting content tomorrow? Maybe! In the meantime, how about some animal yumminess?






The title to this post is a tribute to my boyfriend, Bruce Willis. Know which movie it's from?

Prostrate

This weekend was a blur of inactivity sprinkled with times of rest. I think I slept and lounged more this weekend than I did during the entire week. I managed to leave my house occasionally. Saturday I went to breakfast knitting and Sunday I went out to dinner. Otherwise I was one with some horizontal surface. Dogbert is ready to disown me since her weekend foray into the wilderness was canceled so that I could concentrate on creating a perfect ass impression on the couch. Cat, however, was quite pleased with the lounging and napping and relaxing and planted himself on my lap so as to help my ass sink into the couch a little further and make that perfect ass impression. Though I mostly did nothing other than breathe, something I also worked on perfecting, my sock grew a little.



I am working on the Wild Kat sock, the pattern that came with June's Tofutsie limited edition color sock yarn. I think it is a sock club type of thing, but my LYS had it and I thought I would give it a try.

I am modifying the hell out of the pattern, making it a toe-up ped, with the lace pattern of the leg being the top part of the foot as opposed to the recommended ribbing and I'm using my own gusset/heel preference and have futzed with the stitch count so that it will fit my giganto foot. I really liked the pattern of the leg and had an insane itch to knit it, but didn't want a full sock. It could be because it feels as if I am knitting super fine thread with unbent staples (size US 0 needles). This is thin yarn and super skinny needles, and a row consists of a gagillion stitches. I suspect these peds will take the same amount of time it would take to knit a normal pair of socks so I definitely didn't see a full length sock in my future.



I did think about starting another pair of sideways socks before I whipped out the Tofutsies and even picked out a yarn form the stash. But I hesitated because the sideways sock and me, we don't seem to play well. As you may recall, the first (several) attempts went down in a fiery blaze and the second one was eaten by the ether. Is the third time the charm? I dunno, I'm going to ponder it. But in the meantime, I am going to work on the Tofutsies and practice napping.

Today Was a Snow Day

So Cat played with this:




(Yah, he is still a Florida kitty. That is the only explanation for his unhealthy obsession with the heat vent).

Dogbert played with this:





And I played with this:



Good times all around!

I'm So NOT a Winner

WARNING: The following post contains graphic images of BAD BAD things! Terrible things. Yarn abuse. You may wish to advert your eyes.

Okay, you've been warned .... You will not believe what I did. Hell, I can not believe what I did.



It all started when Snuffleupagus' sleeve look like something out of medieval times. It was about four inches too long and poofy as all hell at the top where I had sewn it in. I started to undo all of my seaming but because it was like the umpteen time I did it, the seam was not coming out. I thought I could see exactly where my seam was, so I very carefully snipped the yarn that was the seam. Apparently I was not careful enough.



When I realized what happened I just about lost my mind. After I finished ranting (for the time being), I told Boo I was going to toss the whole thing in the garbage. I was done. The sweater was stupid to begin with. You name it, I bitched about it. He then very calmly told me that if I was going to pitch it, I should take a knife to it first. Get all of my anger out. I thought about and realized I couldn't do it. I couldn't destroy all of that work. So, it seems that I am going to try to rescue the stupid fuking thing. I thought about working on it this afternoon, but Cat was too busy getting cozy with the carnage.



When I finally shooed him off, I realized that I sliced into the sleeve too. A little extra destruction I hadn't notice before. Yeah!

Birthdays Abound

Let's take a moment to honor the recipe creating ability of Nigella Lawson and the baking ability of Beatrix which, when they converge, make FABULOUS results. Yesterday was Beatrix' son's birthday and she brought a few cupcakes to our SnB gathering. Not only were they great tasting and great looking, they matched my knitting. I knew this was a sign that the cupcake and I were meant to be.

Yesterday was also Baby Girl's first birthday and we decided to throw her a surprise party. By "surprise party" what I mean is that Boo and I (um, really just me) wanted cake (I was unaware that I was going to be making love to enjoying the chocolate cherry cupcake of goodness), so we used this as a convenient excuse. The surprise factor was mostly there so that if we failed to actually get a cake, well then, she couldn't be disappointed by the lack of party now could she? Anywho, let me tell you, she was THRILLED.



NOT! (Yes, I am a child of the 80's/90's. Want to borrow my Z. Cavariccis?) And Cat, he was no better; he wouldn't even get out of bed to come celebrate. If you ever want to insure that your animals are NOT in that party spirit, place a cheap party hat on their heads and take pictures. Oh, and make sure to use the string part to hold the hat on so it won't tip off of the head easily.

We did manage to buy an ice cream cake (and by we I mean Boo, because hello, I suck at this whole birthday party planning thing), so the party was on. I figured that I would have to snap the picture of Baby Girl and her cake toute suite because she would eat it if I was not careful. WRONG! Baby Girl RAN from the cake; she cowered in the corner and stared at it with fear and loathing. What the hell? I didn't even place any candles on it. How is this possible? Um, someone needs to tell her she is a dog and thus by default should want to eat EVERYTHING. Cat was curious but even he didn't get too close.

Cheater

Have y'all heard about NaNoWriMo or NaBloPoMo? No, well, it doesn't really matter. It is just that they led to NaKniSweMo, a Knit-A-Sweater-In-A-Month knit-along and I am soooo gonna do this. But I am cheating. You see, I am already taking a sweater class and have already started my very first sweater, so technically, I might not meet the exact parameters of NaKniSweMo, but that is okay. I'm in. Um, assuming they'll take me. Ha!



And, in unrelated news, I have been told that the kitty is not getting equal face time here on The Blog and that it isn't right. There have been talks of unionizing. Me? Not a lover of the union. (Sorry Joan! Love you though!) So, to squash these ridiculous talks of organization, I present you with ...

"Cat, the Bookmarker"*




* That is bookmaRKer not bookmaKEr. I am the bookmaker, not Cat. You want the Jets on the under for $500? No problem! Just kidding. There is no gambling here. Gambling is illegal and thus betting will not be tolerated. Unless you wanna play the lottery. That is ok.

Poopless in CT

Look!



Pictures! Woo-hoo! Actually Cat looks a bit annoyed, and the total opposite of "Woo-hoo!" at being my first picture ... oh well! Boo tried to get our old camera fixed, but it cost only slightly less than a new one so he bought us a new one. Yeah! How sweet is that? Especially in light of the fact that we totally can't afford it because it is one thousand dollars later we STILL have plumbing issues! All I want is to be able to poop at home. Really. In the name of cookies, cake, and all that is holy, is that TOO much to ask? I think not.

It turns out that I left my blue scarf at home when I went to SnB ... oops! I ended up having to finish my scarf when I got home. Which I did.



Yes, even pumpkins need scarves! I think I am going to need to block the scarf because some of the wavy bits keep scrunching up despite all of my yanking (and boy have I yanked on it). I also think that the scarf could have been a bit longer, but I ran out of the mohair. I did not run out of The Mess yarn. In fact, I have almost half left I think.



It can chill in the stash until I feel inspired. So, since I had no scarf for SnB, I was forced to work on Scratchy McSock. The color has started to grow on me. And I actually like it a lot now. It does have some peach - not keen on the peach - but I am getting past that.



As you can see, I have trudged forward, while asking the powers that be to PLEASE speed up the delivery of the new, shorter, less likely to piss me off, needles. Thus far my prayers have gone unanswered.

And, how neat is my sock displayer? I had a pair of the most awesome hanging vases that I got from Pottery Barn several years ago. One of the glass bits broke in the move to this house (yah, it took me two years to unpack and notice this ... shut it!) and I have surfed the net time looking for a replacement glass (Pottery Barn doesn't carry it ... dummies) with no luck. I have given up on finding a replacement and was waiting for garbage day to toss this out when I realized it is a great sock displayer ... well maybe not great, but useful, useful enough that I have an excuse on why I still haven't tossed it yet. Heh.

I did get annoyed with the needles and start a new pair of socks. Wait! Relax! I finished my scarf so I only have two UFOs going. No need to panic. At least, that is what I am telling myself.



This second sock, I am loving it. I love the yarn, I love the color, I love the needles. But, I am not going to neglect my Scratchy. That wouldn't be right!



Yarn: Blue Heron Yarns Rayon/Metallic (colour: Deep Blue Sea) & Feza Kid Mohair (color 205)
Needles: Addi circulars size 5.
Pattern: Seafoam Stitch
Time: One and one half months.
Care: Hand wash with natural soap, dry flat.

Crikey

So, um, CAN you spare some change? Ha! My camera is still no good ...







And, to add insult to injury, it seems that we have a "main line" blocked in our plumbing. It cost several hundred bucks to find out we had this problem. I shudder to think of how much it is going to cost to actually remedy. Speaking of shuddering ...



I started a new project, instead of finishing my scarf which I swear I am going to finish tonight, at SnB, honestly, I am, because that new project I started? Ick! Now there are a couple of things going on here. First, lets talk about the yarn. I've heard much love for the Opal sock yarn, and, in fact, have purchased it before. And I have knitted it before.



This is the third or fourth scarf I ever knit. I purchased the yarn in Maine one summer while with my aunt. She was a sweater knitter and had never knit socks (the closest thing being Christmas stockings) and was not down with the sock yarn per se. The packaging made it seem like the yarn would knit up all tiger print - the term "rain forest" was on the label too. Rain forest = Tiger = Tiger Print Yarn. We thought a tiger print scarf would be cool. We even talked about it with the yarnmonger. The yarnmonger never said, well this is STRIPING yarn or this is NOT going to knit up in a tiger print. Nada. You can imagine our surprise as stripe after stripe came out perfectly um, striped, with nary a tiger print to be seen. I just kept knitting thinking SOMETHING would happen. It did, stripes, stripes and more stripes.*



In any event, that scarf, despite its stripes, is super soft. So, coming back to my point, I'd heard the love of the Opal, I'd experienced the love of the Opal - sorta - and figured I would make some Opal socks. I saw an Opal sock where the stripes went up and down (instead of around) on a foreign (non-American) company's website and was intrigued so I ordered the Opal yarn from them (in a color very similar to my scarf; I must like tigers a lot) and got the pattern (for free, score!) from them.

But you see, this new Opal yarn? Not soft. In fact, this new Opal yarn? Scratchy. Mind you I am cheap (and masochistic) so I am using this yarn no matter what. I mean, maybe it is scratchy enough to exfoliate my feet while I wear them, right? That'd be useful. But ick. Not nice on the hands while I knit either. It has been suggested (and I hope this is correct) that it might soften up after some washing. I must remember to get me some fabric softener!

So I was a touch despondent over the yarn itself and then I took a closer look at the pattern.** Yowsers. The pattern was a bit more than I wanted to deal with so I decided to instead make some Jaywalkers. Hey, I'm often an hour late and a dollar short, but dammit, I like those Jaywalker socks even if I didn't catch on until about six months after all of the cool kids had already come, conquered, and got the socks (as opposed to getting the t-shirt, get it? Never mind!).

Jaywalkers, yah, the pattern is written for the dpn's, something I am not exactly fabulous with using. But whatever, I didn't understand the alternative toe-up or circular instructions** so I was following the original instructions. Which meant that I had to buy some size one dpn's. I liked the Inox ones I used for Fetching, so I bought some of those. Without really thinking it through. I remembered that I broke a wooden dpn and I remembered that I dented my Addis (I must be a tight fisted knitter or angry or something) so my main objective was "hard to break" since I figured I could use the toe-up recipe once I understood the original one. So, I did manage to fulfill the "hard to break" factor. But these babies, they are EIGHT INCHES LONG. I have stabbed myself over, and over, and over again. Okay self, I thought, time to get shorter ones, in a six inch length, like the size sixes you liked. But I couldn't find any by Inox, or anyone for that matter. I was able to find Susan Bates ones that were seven inches long, and figured one inch shorter was better than nothing, so I bought those - twice - because they come in a four pack and I needed five. But you know what? These ones suck too. For a different reason. They are more grabby and so the yarn doesn't move along the needles. So now, I have been to four stores and am still not thrilled.



I ended up ordering some which I hope I will like better. In the meantime, I will "carry on" and "make it work" (I love you Tim Gunn) but, um, even without the scratchy thing and the needles thing, the color, it isn't coming out all pretty. Argh!?!

So, really, what I'm saying is that I am making some Jaywalkers but I'm not loving them ... twenty-seven paragraphs could have been limited to one sentence. Heh. Life, however, is not all doom and gloom over here. No sirree, we have good stuff too!

HI SECRET PAL! My Secret Pal, she is good stuff. I've already gotten some e-mails and hints of goodies on their way!

And, look at this:





Cuteness!

* Incidentally, I am so sentimental that I will not frog this scarf and make it into the socks that it really wants to be (which I think would look nicer too) since my aunt cast it on for me back when my casting on was spotty at best.

** I have this mental thing with patterns where I can't understand them when I read them. I can't visualize what they are telling me to do. I have to either summon up the energy to just sit down and do it, or someone has to show it to me how to do it.