Tuesday, December 23, 2008


Dear UPS Man:

Please accept my apology for flashing you my milky white legs. I know they stood out spectacularly against my black underwear and stained hot pink tee shirt. It was not my intention to great you sans pants. When I saw your truck and heard the bell ring, I thought you were ringing and running. I had no idea that you would still be in my driveway, let alone at my door awaiting my signature when I flung open my front door. Had I known, I never would have answered the door without my pants on. Heck, if I was expecting a delivery I would not have been pantsless while standing on the ladder in the middle of the huge picture window next to my front door, re-hanging my drapes. Honestly, I typically wear pants around strangers.

In any event, in addition to offering my apology, I would also like to offer my thanks. The fact that you maintained eye-contact, and played along with me, never acknowledging my pantsless state, the entire time I was signing your electronic whodickey was quite professional. If it was up to me, I would award you some type of UPS professionalism award for that.

Again, I'm sorry and thanks!


Jenn said...

Ha, I bet that actually happens to them a lot.

MUDNYC said...

I think I read about this in Penthouse Letters XXII

A South Park Republican said...

Actually, it was Penthouse Letters XXIII ;)

Rebecca said...

I think Jenn's right, they have probably seen that a lot, and probably far worse. Maybe it's in their training manual.