Dear Ms. Crazy,
Thank you for another baby gift. I appreciate it. There is, however, no amount of giftage that will convince me to spend a day, let alone multiple weeks, caring for your six, feral, clawing, biting, pissing-on-everything, like-to-run-away cats. Especially while I am out on maternity leave trying to figure out how to keep Lady Bean alive. Ain't gonna happen. Also, I'm not going to the career fair next year. So, again, thank you, but please, stop with the gifts.